Drama and struggles in the home? How a youth pastor should view it…

Youth Pastors have a unique relationship with families.  Whether parents like it or not and whether youth pastors like it or not, pastors end up learning what life is like at home.  Youth Pastors hear the good, bad and the ugly.  We hear it from the parents and the teens.  Sometimes, youth pastor’s see it firsthand. Depending on what we see or hear can be exciting or awkward.  Let’s assume the youth pastor learns of an altercation at home that is personal, how does the youth pastor view or percieve the family? I’m a youth pastor so here’s how I perceive the family that is dealing with issues in the home…

Normal.

Human.

The sinful nature comes out.

Not perfect.

God help them, they need you now.

Is God the center of the home?

Maybe they don’t know what I know.

Maybe they didn’t have a home like me.

I’m not perfect.

My family has issues and will have more.

Pray.

God they need you.

Offer help in any way possible.

Encourage restoration.

Keep their family business private and confidential.

Support when needed.

Show them they can trust me.

These are things that go through my head and heart when I learn of struggles in the home.  No judgments.  No slander.  No pride.  Do I get mad or frustrated with some things I hear, yes.  However, I remind myself to be gracious and to remember that I am not in their shoes or in that home.  I also remind myself that Satan is working to wreck homes.

Parents, teens, I want you to trust me and other youth pastors with these personal struggles.  If you can trust us then you will feel comfortable seeking our guidance and help.

Grace, this is how I operate, this is how I think about your struggles in the home.  And youth pastors, I hope you use grace when formulating a perspective of the home life of parents and teens you are serving.  We are in a unique position and parents trust us with their teens and their family business that on occasion is revealed.

Parents, I hope you find encouragement in this article.  I hope you have a youth pastor you can trust with family life.  I hope this is the beginning of a stronger partnership!

Love,

Pastor Ryan

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